The Hanging Coffins, an AD&D 1e module up now on Kickstarter

By Polar_Bear
In Crowdfunding
Nov 12th, 2013
3 Comments
496 Views

The Hanging Coffins of the Vampire Queen is a module designed for Advanced Dungeons & Dragons 1st edition that’s looking for funding now on Kickstarter.
Note: Some artwork further down their page isn’t safe for work.

Source

From the campaign for the campaign:

Death or freedom? The Vampire Queen has challenged a small band of her worst prisoners to escape from her wicked dungeon lair. It is up to you to outwit and fight your way through the terrible traps, beastly monsters, and horrific surprises she has arranged for you.

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  • Henrix

    One wonders how this differs so from other 1st ed compatible scenarios out there that it needs a kickstarter.

    The boobage?

    • Soulfinger

      Well, first off, it’s rated “A” for Awesome! Unlike all those other modules rated “F” for Fantastic. Also, it is for “Bad ass players only,” which really limits the audience. You can’t just stock this in a FLGS and hope that someone in your home town will be bad ass enough to buy it, and you’d have to be bad ass, because you are going up against the most dangerous creatures in 1st ed. AD&D: Naked Women. If you see a naked woman in AD&D then you are probably dead already. There are like three dozen varieties of naked women with instant death effects, level draining, etc. in the Monster Manual and its sequels. There’s artwork in this module that shows a vampire queen with two succubi, which means that they’ll try and kiss you and you’ll lose a shit ton of levels. I’m not bad ass enough for that. It took me five years of marriage to get over the fear that my wife was level draining me.

      Then, looking at the artwork, you go up against a vampire master with a skull for a d*ck and four skull testicles (skullsticles?). That’s scary as hell! He probably kissed a LOT of girls to get like that. Pretty much every adventurer in the artwork is getting killed, and the designer likens it to Tomb of Horrors, and it costs a lot of money to design a module like that and then condense it all down into 32 pages of “Extreme Fun.” That’s 72 cents worth of fun per page!

      I know that you are probably expecting him to fund it with his acting income — he was after all, Kramer #2 and the magician in a Budweiser advertisement (I was surprised to see myself in it as the fat alcoholic) — but that’s acting money, which is different than writing money. The two are like oil and water. Only one can be refined into something that will fuel your car. All those other 1st ed. compatible modules had people with writing money to fund them, so no KS required. You’ll understand the logic here when you get older, or at least I may.

  • Osbad

    The Total Awesomeness and Extreme Bad-assery are just overwhelming. Clearly this is a project that is just too Awesome and brimfull of Bad Ass for me.. I’m going to have to pass. Reluctantly.